Wednesday, December 16, 2015

Pot Class and 'Being Mortal'

One of the Cancer Support Network class offerings is a 'Cancer and Cannabis' seminar.  Since I live in a medical marijuana state and am curious to know what all the fuss is about, I went - and brought a friend!  First, I was struck by just how normal everyone looked in this class, including the instructor. (I really should work on my pre-judgment issues :-)  The first half of the class was like learning a new language:  THC, CBD, FECO, cannabinoids, terpenes, tincture, vaping,  and on and on.  Then the discussion turned to how to use medicinal marijuana.  Small quantities (2 to 10 mg) are used for pain relief and sleeping, and stronger dosages claim to actually shrink tumors and keep cancer from metastasizing.  The key is in the production of the cannabis product and dosing.  Production is an issue because lack of regulation means that some products are actually being produced with carcinogenic products, and without a clear understanding of dosage, someone who has very little experience like yours truly can have some very bad psycho side effects.  Basically, if I choose to use in the future, I will seek out the guidance of a qualified pot professional first.

It is currently midnight as I am writing this blog post - the eve of a follow-up PET scan, and I can't sleep.  I really have no reason to fear the test and results.  My blood work numbers were good today, and I will have immune therapy treatment #14 a couple hours after the scan.  I am finding that the most difficult part of having cancer is not physical, but rather psychological and emotional.  Earlier this evening I watched a PBS Frontline episode title 'Being Mortal'.  It was based on Atul Gawande's book of the same title, which I had read a couple of months after I received my diagnosis.  It was a tough read.  The topic of the book is facing end of life issues.  The subject is a definite downer, but I recommend both the book and the Frontline episode to any with cancer and their loved ones.  I very much hope and continue to actively work toward a long and healthy life, but I also feel very strongly that it is important to be prepared to have a good death, so I really appreciate the candid honesty of the doctors and patients in both the book and the documentary.  While watching the Frontline episode, I was struck by the meaning of the title 'Being Mortal' - not only does it apply to the cancer patients featured, but it very much applies to the oncology doctors.  They are mortal, not gods.  Medicine can go only so far, and it really is up to us to be prepared to make sacred decisions about the meaning of a good death for ourselves.  Have the difficult discussions with loved ones and make sure they know your wishes, so that you are spared suffering and your loved ones won't have to agonize over whether they are making the right choices on your behalf.

Since I am currently yawning - I am off to cuddle up with my canine care team.  Here is another CA sunset - Enjoy!